What I learn about men each day

My life in a coffee shop. May interactions and dealings with customers every day. Mostly about men because they are so memorable. For women to read because we will see these traits in all of our men.

Friday, March 31, 2006

Internet Dating Man Again

I worked tonight at the coffee shop. Friday is a fun night . I get to see men after work all excited for the weekend. Some of them are headed out to happy hour and want to grab a coffee to keep them awake for the night . There are also those who choose to meet a first date at a coffee shop. My shop is very popular for this because it is near many restaurants. If the date goes well then they both head out to dinner together. If not they leave separately.
I have seen this same guy several times now at my shop.
He comes in and meets a woman. They talk for about an hour and then their "date" is over. Sometimes not even an hour. He walks her to her car and than guess what? He stays around for another internet date! He is actually meeting 3 or 4 women in a night for coffee. Also with him is his computer for quick access to the internet dating site while waiting.
Each time he approaches my counter with a different woman and buys a refill for himself and a nonfat latte for her. Big spender! They make small talk and chat for awhile. I have never seen this man leaving for dinner with any women.
I wonder what the criteria would be for him to give up all the later dates and concentrate on 1 date? What is he looking for in a woman? I sometimes want to ask him these questions but I think he would mistake my curiosity for interest. I don't want to be another "coffee date" for anyone.
Has anyone had any of these coffee dates for themselves? Let me know. If you see this guy beware and stay away.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

CHIC MAGNETS

So what are chic magnets? They are props or pets that men use to draw women into conversations. It is funny how I see it everyday and sometimes even I fall for the "cutest puppy" in the world trick.
So today I was working in the coffee shop and there were several men inside and outside at tables reading books. Nothing unusual. I have seen this prop used before so I wasn't fooled. Here's how it works.
The textbook is usually something technical. A really good book is a medical text/magazine so that the unsuspecting woman thinks that they have snagged a doctor or at least a med student. Hold the book up so the woman notices than make some eye contact and smile at her. "Nice day isn't it?". And they are off into a conversation about medicine and you can tell he is trying to make it up as he goes. To watch this is a thing of beauty. Some guys really work it for several hours at a time. They go through several women and almost 90% of the time I get the question' "Do you have a pen I can borrow to write down a phone # ,?"
I have also seen this done with a BIBLE. It seems pretty strange to me that a guy would pick up women with a Bible. That doesn't sound quite right!
So I think that my word of warning ladies is not to believe what you see. Look further than the reading material and use your good judgement.
Anyone fallen for this type of guy lately? Anyone seen this type of guy in a coffee shop lately? Tell us about it.
Happy reading everyone.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

CELL PHONE CRAZIES

So has anyone out there had any similar experiences in the customer service area? In the doctors office, at the grocery store or even at a wedding. At my wedding there will be a fancy cell phone blocker sent from the CIA especially for me. HAHA Let's hear them. I know everyone has run into a cell phone-aholic. You know them, they just can't put it down. Sometimes the customers have 2 phones on their belts. Geez what a phone bill that must be!
Bring it on and vent with my readers about the insanity of cell phones.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Some days you shouldn't get out of bed.

Today was one of those days we all have. They start off with a premonition of doom. You know the feeling. You're lying in bed and you know it's all going to be bad. If I just had listened to myself this morning I could have totally skipped my Monday at work.

CELL PHONE HELL !!!

It seemed as if every customer was a man on a cell phone. Tell me who all these people are talking to. One younger man was talking to his mom and telling her that the light has gone out of his lovers eyes when they are together. Of course everyone behind him now also knows this info. I'm not sure if I want to be telling my mom that at all. He then proceeded to give mom his new phone # which my whole coffee shop heard. I'm sure all the girls in line will be calling him offering condolences.
I think men like to use cell phones in public to draw attention to themselves. You know- like how much their deal is worth, talking to their car mechanic about their new acquisition. They also talk a lot about their wives/girlfriends. They talk about sports and how much they are betting. If I hear one more conversation about their trip to Cabo or Vegas I will scream!

I think it is so funny when they try and order something to drink and then whisper their order to me. Like it is some big secret where they are. They are all out getting a Latte. We at work try to make as much noise as possible to let everyone in the world know where these guys are. It is not a secret any longer when we get done with them!
Yes I have a cell phone and I try to be courteous when using.

Does anyone else have cell phone problems ? I am sure I am not the only one.

Addicted or not ?

My friends and I did an informal survey in the coffee shop one day. The question was " Do you drink coffee for the taste or for the caffeine jolt ?"
It was apparent to me that not many people wanted to admit they couldn't get through their morning without a cup of coffee. A very large cup of coffee.
At the start of the survey the answers were all about the taste. You guys really brew great coffee and I love the taste of it. Can't start my day without a cup.

I KNEW THEY WERE LYING TO THEMSELVES !

However as the morning passed and customers started to become honest then we heard all about how they wanted coffee solely for the caffeine jolt. "Heck with the taste. We can't stand the taste of coffee , only want the caffeine!"

You can see them coming a mile away. Desperate for a cup of any kind of coffee. You can see them driving on the freeway in the morning. And most women or men wake up next to a caffeine addict. You all know what that is about. Don't talk to me till I've had a cup. Did you set the coffee timer last night kind of people.

This all makes me very glad I do not drink coffee!

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Saturday in the coffee shop

I am up at 5am today to get ready for work. I love being up early but I don't really want to talk to anyone that early. However I get paid to serve people and be friendly. Imagine that. Let's see who I might meet and greet today.......

The Harly man
The Surfer
The click-clacker ( biyclist)
The grunge man
The metro-sexual man
The internet-dating man
The addicted to coffee...... the legal drug man
The father with 4 kids
The boyfriend with the jealous mate staring daggers at me cause her boyfriend thinks I am more funny and attentive.

That is only the beginning of the cast of characters for today. Come back and I'll let you know who was the inspiration for the Sunday blog!

That is only the beginning

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Sweaty Money $$$$$$

So I don't feel like writing today. I have been working lots of days in the coffee shop and have been "out-manned" . Get it ???? I have seen the best of the best and the worst of the worst, men's behavior that is. Which brings me to a very unpleasant, actually disgusting subject for today. So awful I have a hard time talking about it.
SWEATY MONEY !!!!!
Remember I was telling you about the spandex man, the cyclist? Well let's revisit that type of guy.

Women know all about spandex or lycra. The wonder material made for smoothing and concealing lumps and bumps. Let's think about where women could possibly carry money if wearing spandex. HAHA in a purse, silly.
Men wearing spandex have no purses or bicycle bags. They just fit those bill and change and credit cards and phone into a nice little wad and STUFF it in their pants. No wonder they bulge so much!
So imagine how they pay for a Latte after a bike ride of say, 2 hours or so.
A typical conversation:
COCO: Good morning how are you today?
BIKER: Give me a skinny latte now.
COCO: Glad to see you too, that will be $4.00.
-now biker pulls money from deep in his spandex bike shorts where the sun don't shine.-
COCO: Why is this money dripping wet? Do you possibly have any dry money?
BIKER: There is nothing wrong with this money. I have been riding for 2 hours.
COCO: Did you ever consider that people might not want to handle money if it has been in your crotch for 2 hours?
BIKER: All of us have this type of money.

AAAAARGH: there are 10 of his cycling buddies behind him in line!!!!

The coffee shop continues to be a place of amazing men. As I told one man who asked me" How do you remember people's names every day?". I replied " Some people are just memorable. Some because of unpleasant interactions and some people for very positive interactions." So watch how you interact with people. I always want to be remembered for the positive interactions. If I was a man I wouldn't want to be remembered as the "the sweaty money guy"!

Monday, March 20, 2006

Please Ask About Me and I'll TEll You

Monday March 20th 5:30am

So today is the first day of Spring. The weather was actually cold and chilly. Kind of a good day to stay in bed and dream the morning away. Read a good book. Watch some TV.
I learned today that men really like to talk about themselves, a lot.
I was in the cafe' today just doing my work, being friendly and ventured out into the man's world. I just wanted to see what a few of them were doing on this cold and dreary day. WELL-they never stopped talking about their activities for the day. A simple "Hi. How are you"? became a "well let me fill you in on my day".
They were surfing, biking, running ,training for marathons, some were watching the surfers and then some were watching the waves(fascinating things those waves). Not one of these guys were going back to bed on a cold and dreary morning.
All of the men I spoke with really perked up and took my questions today as a sign of interest in them personally. They never returned the questions and asked me about my day. They were quite happy to tell me about themselves, only themselves. I even heard a few "How bout we ride the waves together honey". "I'll be back in a few hours and you can make me another Latte". Men we should avoid at all cost. If you want to have a conversation , that is a two way conversation than STAY AWAY.

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Spandex Wearing Men

Sunday June 4th

I just had to re-run this blog. The weather has been very warm and there have been a ton of cyclists this weekend. Men- please read and take some friendly advice!

What women doesn't love spandex ? It is a miracle material. It is able to smooth out a body and make us look put together. It is stretchy and feels good. Right?

However Spandex wasn't made for men !!!

Today was a Staurday at work which means the bicyclists were out on the road. They were also buying coffee at the cafe'. I have seen way too much bike clothes this weekend for a lifetime. The funny thing about these spandex wearing men is that they think they look good in bike pants!
Let me tell you THEY DO NOT look good. Believe me no one wants to see every lump and bump on your body. It is not attractive. The majority of you guys shouldn't be on a bike you are so out of shape. The rest of you are so full of yourselves that you deliberately show off your "package" to anyone. You show it to little babies, to teens, to other bikers and yes you are showing "all" to grandmothers as well. Please do everyone a favor and cover your pudgy, lumpy self up! Well, that was certainly a rant wasn't it?

Remind me to talk about the bicyclist "sweaty money". You can just imagine how their money ends up sweaty if they can't carry a wallet in their spandex shorts.

I actually ran the sweaty money blog back in March and got a lots of very negative response, from cyclists. I guess they don't like to read what others observe about their behavior.
Have a great Sunday
Coco

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Monday blues

Hello Monday-What I learned today......
Men who carry babies in their arms to attract women are NOT attractive.
Today at the cafe' there were several men with babies or young children. They allowed their kids to scream and shout for what they wanted. When dad said" no honey" then they shouted more. Of course giving them lots of attention and far more than they originally wanted so they would shut up!
Perhaps they should not venture in to world with their offspring. They can't control them.
So if you dated one of these guys, how would the date go???
Hello Suzie I am here to pick you up. I'm sorry I am not ready, come back later. Okay.
Hey Tom can we go to that new Thai place for dinner? No honey I don't like Thai food.
Suzie then starts to scream and cry. Tom caves in and not only go to Thai for dinner but buys Suzie ice cream after for being such a good girl.
Hey that doesn't sound half bad. I get what I want and extra too if I scream and cry with Tom.
But is that really the type of guy for you in the long run. I imagine that scenario would get old pretty soon.
Come back tomorrow for more dish on the men I serve each day. You won't believe them!

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Sunday 3/12/06

Sunday was a wonderful day . I learned nothing about men today because it was my day off. As much as I love men I think that a day not spent observing them is a good thing. It leaves me with a fresh start to my work week and a new perspective on life. A day off refreshes you and clears your mind for the week to come.
So, What's up for tomorrow???? Back to my job in a coffee shop. Serving I would estimate 80% men each day. I know that all of you reading have had similar interactions with men each day. Let's get together and share our stories and observations each day.
Check in each day as I serve up my stories and happenings in CoCo's Cafe'.